UNUSUAL
SCHOOL STORM PROCEDURES
INVESTIGATED
January saw a couple of ice storms
and with tornado season just around the corner, The Chronicler was interested
in the storm procedures at our local school. Normally these are posted
and teacher and students practice doing fire drills, tornado drills, etc.
That is the case at the Morrison school as well with one notable exception.
Storm procedures are specific to each teacher and area of the buildings
so, for example, Ms. Roberts may be instructed to take her students to
a certain area of the building for a tornadoe warning and is given the
shortest escape route for her students in case of fire. Nothing about this
procedures seemed unusual until reading the instructions for JOE SINDELAR.
During tornadoes, instead of seeking shelter in a reinforced area of the
building, Joe is to go outside and stand in the middle of the street and
wave his arms wildly and make faces at the tornadoe. This seem a
bit odd until the Chronicler interviewed a number of people about the possible
reason for such a policy. (SEE NEXT COLUMN) |
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REASONS
FOR PROCEDURES VARY
Randy Shiever was asked about
the special instructions for JOE SINDELAR during the tornadoe
warning. He was asked specifically if there was any scientific reasoning
to have Joe stand in the street waving his arms and making faces at the
tornado. Randy answered that he was unaware of any data that would support
the hypothesis that Joe could actually scare a tornado away. However, he
was quick to add, "But what have we got to lose in trying it?" Along the
same lines, David Cartmell had a comment about the fire policy requiring
JOE SINDELAR to stay in the burning building and seek out the fire in order
to blow on it. David said, "What have we got to lose?" Besides, instead
of blowing on the fire, if JOE would just TALK to the fire about how he
survived the wrestling match with Benes, the hot air produced would be
enough to suffocate any flame (and any person within a half block radius.)
Still, these theories on tornado safety and fire prevention have not been
tested but the general consenus of the Greater Morrison area seems to be,
"What have we got to LOSE?"
When superintendent Dennis
"W" Casey was asked about the unusual procedures he replied, "No comment."
(Boy that boy learns fast doesn't he?)
DrBenes@hotmail.com |
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JOE
SINDELAR LAUNCHES WEB PAGE !
As incredible as it may sound,
JOE SINDELAR has entered the decade of the 1980s with the launching of
his very own web page! Of course he didn't actually build it but
the move has lead some to think that maybe Joe is now only 3 decades behind
the times. The Chronicle believes that is only optomistic thinking. Even
with this web page, Joe has not escape controversy. The web posts
a image of Joe that is MUCH too flattering and is in conflict with the
official photo published by The MORRISON CHRONICLE in past issues. Compare
for yourself...
you can also visit his page at http://www.morrison.okschools.net/Mr.%20Sindelar.htm
FCC INSTALLS NEW ANTENNA
TO MONITOR JOE SINDELAR
The school was recently notified of a
new antenna to be install in OKC to monitor the movements of Joe Sindelar.
The microchip in his brain sends out signals that will be picked up by
the new antenna. It is not known exactly when the microchip was installed
but most likely it happened after the Benes/Sindelar wrestling match when
Joe was unconscious for quite a while. ............................................................. |
